Job Hunting.. And What Sophie Said..

Hello there..
I have been job hunting for the past week and after sending out a few resumes I finally got called for an interview! I won't say where but what I can say is that it's a hotel. Hehe.. After I got the call I immediately lifted Sophie up and did a Happy Feet Penguin dance. "Yay! Mama got called for an interview Sophie! One feet already in the door! If mama get the job mama can buy you better things, not worry about the rent or buying your milk. Can buy makeup...," I sang to Sophie..

Then when I finally calmed down something hit me like a ton of bricks.. I won't be able to spend as much time with Baby Sophie anymore! Oh tidaaakkkk! I knew this day would come. The day when I would have to send Little Sophie to a nursery in the care of strangers and will only be able to see her in the evenings. I won't be the first one to notice if she does something new, and will only be able to spend 4 to 5 waking hours with her (maybe even less if I have to work OT) Oh, my aching heart! *Can you hear my heart breaking and the violins playing in the background?*

I literally sat down and wept and another litany began. "Ala Sophie.. Kalo mama kerja sudah nda la mama dapat tengo Sophie ketawa2 and senyum2 selalu ni.. Nda la mama dengar Sophie goo goo or see you focusing your attention so seriously at your tiny fist as often as I'd like.. Nda la mama dapat..", and it went on and on and on.. Sophie looked at me with a puzzled look on her face.. Frowning ni, macam dia bingung napa mama dia kejap ketawa, kejap nangis? *Pedahal sama jak macam perangai dia.. Hehe..*

Then she smiled and squealed at me and I literally felt as if she said,"Ah, mama ni. Nothing to worry bah, I'll be fine". I started to laugh and cry at the same time. Yes, she will be alright Insya Allah.. Amin.. My baby girl is strong and brave and as her mama I have to be just as strong and brave. Baru layak jadi her mama kan?

Part of me is half hoping that I would get the job while the other half is selfishly hoping that I won't. However, deep in my heart I know that getting the job is for the best. That as long as I work with a sincere heart to support my baby girl, the shorter time we get to spend together won't matter too much because Allah will keep both of us in each other's heart and that she is still my little precious gem at the end of the day no matter what. InsyaAllah, Amin..

Aduh, emosi pula punya post ni kali kan? Nangis2 kunun sy dalam CC type ni post tau. Sy rasa ni orang sebelah sy ingat sy ni tengah gaduh ma boypren atau baru break ni. Hahaha.. Lap punya lap air mata, abis sleeve baju hitam sy kena smear BB Cream. Great... Story of my life.. Huhu.. Lain kali sila bawa lappy dan guna wifi okay Phy. Walaupun orang di sebelah ingat ko gila sebab emo2 saturang, at least free tu Internet usage. *Geleng2 kepala* Sigh!

Anyway, this is all for now people. Will update more on how the interview went. Cheers!

Love,
Phoebe